been away for a little while. things have been a bit busy but if i'm gonna be honest, i've been gone because i've been tryin not to acknowledge that i've given up. when you give most of your heart away, you have nothin to fall back on but all pieces that have been broken. and those pieces have been piercin and stabbin me for months now. the truth of the matter is most of this i caused on myself. the first time, shame on you. the second, shame on me. so i will bare my shame and my hurt and my anger, turnin it inward and away from others although it would be easier to lash out not everyone deserves my ire. so for the time being, i will keep what little pieces of me i have left. of the pieces that remain, they will never cut me as much as the pieces i gave away. this whole thing is my own fault really. so what now then? nothing. a barren, hollow emptiness. that is all that remains of the place where i used to care. so allow me to apologize in advance if i seem a bit distant. or cold. previous experience has beaten into me that it cost too much to give a shit . . .
