Deciding

so, i met someone.  i was mindin my own business, while at work no less, and in walked him.  have you ever seen someone and you just knew that this person was gonna be in your life for a while?  well, that's what happened.  now of course, bein a skeptic, i wasn't sure how this meetin was gonna play out.  see, i've been in a quite similar situation.  a few years ago i met another someone and knew from the moment our eyes met, somethin was bound to happen.  and happen it did, just not in the way or manner i had initially hoped. 


well, here i am again.  and as i took notice of this someone i was pleasantly surprised that this someone had also noticed me.  even though i was at work.  even though i wasn't all dolled up or decked out like i am if i plan to go out.  and even though other people have noticed me before, this was different.  somethin clicked.  somethin sparked and sizzled.  and i think it's safe to say i like it. 


so this should be the part where i get all excited and have flutters of anticipation.  this should be where i can't wait until the next time i get to see this someone or talk to them.  where my phone chimes with a text or rings with a selected tone so i know exactly who is tryin to reach me, and i can't stop smilin.  it's supposed to be where we are tryin to spend time gettin to know each other better and clear our schedules so we can have time to be together.


i'm happy to report that we have been doin exactly that . . .

The New Toy

watch kids play.  they take their time, perusin the toys in the box.  sometimes they share, sometimes they don't.  there are kids who like to play alone and then there are those who will form little groups.  some are swappers and others prefer to not look in the box at all.  either way, most of the toys get a turn.  but then, there is the new toy.  it's that elusive object that you may have had your eye on, that someone else is hoggin all to themselves.  it's that toy that seems shiny and new and unused.  and all of a sudden, EVERYONE wants a turn.  suddenly, there are yelps and screams and cries for this fascinatin item . . .


meet the new toy.


it's been quite a while since i've actually lived here.  i've been home on yearly visits, but now that i'm here to stay it seems like i'm gettin a lot of attention.  i'm usually mindin my own business and along will come some person (read guy). this person may try to strike up a conversation or just say somethin "witty" or "charmin". and me being me, i have realized that it takes quite a bit of courage to not only approach a lady, but to actually talk to her.  this means that i'm gonna participate. i may smile, i may laugh but i always try to say somethin.  you can't imagine the looks of relief i get when i do somethin as simple as acknowledgin that someone is talkin to me.  it's crazy how appreciative people (read guys) are when you reply to "hello" or "good mornin" or "how are you?"  it's insane! 


but by far, the most interestin reaction to me simply bein myself, is how other people (read women) respond.  apparently, i missed the memo about not speakin.  i'm not supposed to be approachable or cordial.  i'm not supposed to smile, or laugh, or reply to any words or gestures made towards me.  i'm not supposed to be the one to initiate any encounters either.  this confounds me.


i'm not out to break up any relationships nor to lead anyone on.  i am just bein me.  i can't help it if guys seem to sense that i'm not gonna roll my eyes or walk away the minute they stand next to me or open their mouths.  i like people.  i like talkin to people and meetin new people.  i like laughin and smilin and makin people comfortable. 


new toy in the toybox . . .